MEN ASSUMING ROLES AS CAREGIVER NEED SPECIAL SUPPORT
BY DIANE C. LANE – STAFF WRITER
Do you ever get used to changing the diaper of the woman who once diapered your babies? How do you deal with not knowing how to cook a simple meal when you used to be a company CEO? What should you say when your wife, afflicted by Alzheimer’s disease, asks you to have sex every time you visit her in the nursing home? Read the rest of this entry »
October 20th 2012
October has been a trying month with Anna’s Condition becoming deeper into her illness that triggered a new evaluation to cope with the current level.
It started on a Friday (which is my golf day) I bring Anna to Day Care on Wednesday and Friday @ 7:30 A.M. and proceed one exit up off the Interstate to my Golf Club. There I enjoy being away from my chores and gives me a change to relax. I have lunch at the club and usually pick up Anna @ 1:00 PM. This particular Friday I could not get Anna out of bed, I kept trying every fifteen minutes attempting leave @ 7:00 A.M. which is the time necessary to arrive at my Club in time for tee off. Unfortunately I was unable to accomplish this; I called to cancel Day Care and my golf date.
In every Caregivers life it is very important to have leisure time this promotes better health for the caregiver and enables them to function at a level that is conducive with the everyday care that they provide.
To enable me to continue golfing I would need to have coverage starting @ 6:30 A.M. I starting with the newspaper seeking to find an aide that would be willing to start @ 6:30 A.M. and work until 2:30 PM. I got real lucky and found an Aide seeking a position. The date was Monday October 15th; I called the Aide and arranged an interview early noon. It seems all prayers that my family and friends asked for were answered.
I was able to accomplish a complete back-round check to be sure that all credentials including a criminal back-round were acceptable. Once cleared Nancy reported for work on October 16th @ 6:30 A.M.
Nancy has a nursing back-round and has provided a service to me that I have not been able to experience before. She provides all medical service for Anna and has bonded in the short time she has been with us very nicely. In addition to this she provides housekeeping chores on her own. It does not get any better than this. My hope is that she will stay on as long as necessary.
To all Caregivers, do your due diligence when hiring people to work in your home, although they pass all early tests you must still keep your guard up to be sure they continue working with your patient at the level you expect and not get into a position that will enable them to do any harm physically or criminal.
Visited the nursing home @ 8:15 A.M. I checked into room 323 and to my surprise Anna was still in bed asleep. When I asked the aid why Anna was still sleeping she advised me that she was trying to wake Anna up for a while but to no avail. As she left the room and I tenderly touched Anna and whispered it was Sal. She woke up immediately and gave me a big smile. Read the rest of this entry »
I arose @ 4:15 A.M. to meet the day accomplished some administrative work, read the morning paper prepared breakfast and left at 8:45 A.M. to visit Anna and readying myself for fighting nursing home issues.
Before visiting Anna it was a must to see the Administrator, Admissions, Account payable and the Care Plan Coordinator. I wrote a letter to the Administrator advising that I made up a Care Plan for Anna and would like to go over the plan with her and also other questions I had. Read the rest of this entry »
After the bad day Friday, I was tired and retired at 11:00 pm. Friday evening and forced myself to sleep until 6:30 A.M. After some chores I proceeded to the nursing home to arrange to sign Anna out of the facility for the day and return her at 6:15 PM Saturday evening. I was hoping today would be one of those Alzheimer’s disease good days Read the rest of this entry »
I had great plans for the day but they turned out to be illusions of grandeur and a reminder why there are so many frustrations with Alzheimer’s. I awoke @ 5:00 A.M. excited to meet the day and had some special plans… Bring Anna to the Elks for dinner and dancing. When I arrived at the facility at 4:00 PM. I had a beautiful outfit (Pink) and I was wearing a pink jacket. (we always attempted to match when visiting the Elks). Read the rest of this entry »
I arose @ 4:00 P.M. still upset about Anna’s condition. As I prepared breakfast I began to think about the routines we shared while I was the sole caregiver for Anna and how the nursing home routines needed to be familiar to her. I finished up things at home and got ready to visit the facility and confront the R.N on duty to determine how they were handling Anna’s hygiene, medication, and black and blue bruises. Read the rest of this entry »
I arrived at the facility about 1:00 pm and signed Anna out to be with me, I noticed black and blue marks on both arms in the muscle area. My mind immediately began to question the nursing home care she was receiving and I needed to get to the bottom of this. Read the rest of this entry »
I arose @ 4:00 am to meet the day, did my usual chores, made breakfast which I ate 25% of, cleaned the dishes and other normal chores. I focused on finding a routine to keep me busy and focused on this new phase.
At 7:30 A.M. I left for church, mass begins @ 8:00 A.M. Anna & I always sat in the first row pew and were greeted all the time by other parishioners. When they stopped by to greet me the first question was where is Anna. I was still in shock from Saturday and was in no condition to get into lengthy conversations, was all choked up, but answered with a choked up voice that she was in a nursing home. It was a very difficult task to continue answering our friends, however, it had to be done and I was praying for a fast mass so I could get to see Anna as I was very apprehensive about how she was handling the transition. Read the rest of this entry »
Saturday 7-14-2012 – The worst day of my life but part of the Alzheimer’s stages… Admitting Anna into a nursing home.
We arrived Saturday A.M. @ 8:30 A.M., met Fernando the supervisor on duty, together we unloaded my vehicle and signed in then proceeded to the third floor, Anna was assigned Room 319A. I stayed on for about half and hour and was emotionally upset and had to leave. When I entered my vehicle and sat at the driver’s seat I emotionally lost it, cried uncontrollable for 10 minutes before I could leave the parking lot. Read the rest of this entry »